Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Randomize
