The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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