I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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