In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
