the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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