Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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