Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
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