I skipped work to stalk him.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Randomize
