ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize