Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize