it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
