Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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