He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
