At least make sure they are 18
Why
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Randomize
