why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize