Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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