its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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