You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I currently don't understand fingers.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
