You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
