Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
