what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
