Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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