I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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