If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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