Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
