So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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