I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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