i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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