Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Randomize
