Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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