The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
