I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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