So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
