So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
