Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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