Only a mothe r could love this liver
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
