There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
