So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
it hurts more in the daytime
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
