I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize