you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
