I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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