you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
