You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize