Buhtt sex?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize