I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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