? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize