So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
