i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
