That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
