God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
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